Friday the 13th, UnFrickin' Lucky!

The 13th was a very unlucky day. I got a call from Dr. Kim in CA stating that there may be a problem. Only, he left a message from his cell. on a Friday. SWEET....Can't be good! Just CAN'T... once i got that call i knew by his voice that this couldn't be good.

I talked to the doctor and he seemed very pessimistic. Which made me worry. He told me Shannon's estrogen patches weren't doing the trick to build the lining of her uterus. Which would make it impossible to do an embryo transfer. If the lining is too thin the embryos won't be able to "stick". I asked him what the options were. He basically said, to stop all meds, wait until her cycle resumes back to normal and try again, only with injectable estrogen instead of patches that apparently isn't being absorbed properly. OR..........you can get another surrogent and when that happens you can start this all over again. (I thought....."yeah...right.....find someone else.....THAT'S EASY!") I think he heard the horror in my voice. But he really had nothing other than "i'm soo sorry the patches work fine 95% of the time!" I thought. That doesn't mean they can't now!!!!! OF COURSE the 5 % chance of something NOT working i fell into... I some how thought through all this that i couldn't let this get me too far down. I couldn't just let this get me depressed. I couldn't. So, After a good cry and a good sigh with Ryan. I decided we couldn't hide. And I'd make my husband go to the "blessings" for our California adventure party. That was thrown just for us by my bible study.
It was the hardest thing to do to tell those people what we thought was going to happen wasn't. IT was even harder to see my husband be so venerable to a complete (well not totally) room of strangers.
I knew those people were the ones to open up to. With my husband and my tears. They did a great job. I must say. Their prayers, their encouragement. Their faith. ALL helped us realize God's still here, and the people that love us are still here.

I got a call from Shannon Saturday morning. She had heard from Dr. Kim. And with some questions Shannon was persistent THANK GOD. Dr. Kim said we can give it to monday with more patches on ( i think she has 5 now).So, here i sit in front of the laptop in Hollywood Los Angeles CA. With my husband next to me. Shannon has a Dr. visit tomorrow back in North Carolina to see if anything has changed b/c she added patches. You don't know how much i prayed on the plane here that God does something big with this trip.

Some of you all reading this right now may not believe in this entity i call my Saving Grace. I call my joy beyond all my joys. But I'm here to tell you whatever happens MY GOD will overcome. Even if it looks like i fail at this part of it. My J-E-S-U-S will be here to cry with me. My God will show me how this is just one more step in this storybook of mine i call life.

That 5% that doctors say it can't happen...my God works his MAGIC in. Yes, maybe in medicine and science but that's still His hand. Science had said 5% chance of things not working...that 5% we fall into. WHAT HAPPENS THEN?

SO, if you want to believe that my god doesn't exist and isn't truly still alive. Fine, but let my life be a testimony. Let my FAMILY be a testimony that there's something you can't see that's bigger than science.


Sorry for the preaching. I just know God's gunna do something big with this part of my life. THIS IS MY STORY....... THIS IS OUR STORY....... THIS IS TRUE LIFE!

I know you'll love me anyways!
I Love You!

Thanks for everything, all of you guys! Seriously!!! I couldn't do it with out you!

BTW the 14th wasn't so unlucky!